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"I went on, with my uncle just listening and watching my face. "I was really scared. He was looking at me and touching my leg. I had a long skirt on. He reached down for the hem and pulled and pushed it up and started touching my bare knee and thigh. He like forced his hand between my legs and touched me, you know, down there, through my panties. I begged him to stop, but he didn't."My uncle was crying too. He really does love me. He told me when I was 13 that he had wanted a daughter but that he and his wife had all boys instead, so he was gonna love me like his very own all my life.I know that my mom and dad would've found ways to blame me. They would've asked: Why didn't I cry out? Why didn't I get right off the bus again when the driver looked at me that way? Why did I sit where I did, where I was helpless and couldn't get away?I lied to my uncle, making up the story as I went along, "I felt him start to pull my undies aside, you know, to uncover my womanhood, when we pulled into. That she didn’t consider Bobby “a keeper” was based on somewhat complicated emotions. Bobby had seen her at her worst; bawling, fearful, and completely unhinged. She loved him for not reminding her of that, but could not get it out of her mind that he had seen her that way. At the same time, what he was giving her was more than enough to keep her happy. Still, she was aware on some level, that some day Bobby might not be there anymore. It wasn’t that she thought he’d leave her high and dry. It was more like some other woman might decide he was a keeper, and such a woman might not appreciate him paying attention to other women.In any case, as May loomed, and the suggestion that winter was finally over for sure began to fill the air, Janet looked at the men around her in a very different way than she had just a few months ago.Twice she picked up the phone to call and make a doctor’s appointment, to get a prescription for the pill. The first time, she was put on hold, and eventually hung.
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