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After that I started doing things again, seeing people and living. Taking my kids and grand kids to dinner or something. They tried to fix me up a couple times but I wasn't ready for that. A couple were very good looking and friendly, I was just not ready for anyone new yet. I finally started going around to some of the places we had been, remembering and crying, feeling sorry for myself. After a few months I started to get used to it and the crying mostly went away. I was still barely getting by emotionally but that improved. I actually took one of the women my kids had introduced to dinner. We had a good time but no sex, just a quick goodnight kiss, I still wasn't ready. It upsets paige if I bring up what we were when I visit so I usually sit and watch her with her friends. They all know me and they hug and kiss me and I think a couple hit on me. I don't see much except Paige when I'm there though. I used to see her every day but now it's every two to three weeks. It tears me up. Steve entered behind her."Again, apologies for the mess, if I knew a lady was coming I would havecleaned up a bit."He quickly picked up the empty cans and fast food cartons littering theroom and shoved them into the overflowing bin in the corner, he brushedcrumbs off the sofa, and indicated for Mike to sit down, with a gallantwave of his hand.Mike almost laughed out loud as he compared how Steve was treating himnow, to how things were the last time he visited, before... Then he hadhad to sit amongst all the trash, and Steve and Rob's language had beenmostly composed of swear words, as they had all watched a horror moviewith lots of naked women being murdered.But now she was a woman... that made a huge difference... She'd been sofilled with sorrow and despair that Mike hadn't once thought about theimplications of her new gender over the past couple of weeks.As she sat down on the sofa she had sat on so many times before, it feltdifferent with a big chubby behind instead of a muscly.
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