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”Tom turned to Sherry and said, “I guess I’m supposed to carry you out, too.”“No. I’m supposed to be a dignified old broad,” replied Sherry. She extended a pinky and rubbed the corner of her mouth with it in a parody of class.Tom laughed and retorted, “Wrong on all three counts. You aren’t dignified, old, or a broad. You’re my sexy Sherry mouse.”“Well Tom Cat, in that case...”Tom stood up and lifted his wife with an ease that suggested he was a much younger man. He carried her down the aisle while she giggled like a schoolgirl. As he passed Cathy and George, George said, “Ain’t no way I’m carrying you out of here. I’d break my back.”A roar of laughter provoked by George’s comment filled the room even as Jenny’s parents exited. The Reverend stood at the front of the room shaking his head in wonder. After the previous night, he’d been half convinced that the ceremony would end with Jerry carrying her out. He hadn’t expected the Best Man to carry out the Maid of Honor or the Bride’s. I knew I was lying on the carpet in our living room. I knew it was my birthday. I knew that my entire extended family was in the room staring at me – that’s the other reason I didn’t want to open my eyes. I knew I’d just had hysterics in front of everyone and then collapsed.The one thing I was drawing a complete blank on was ... why.I looked inside my brain and the place where my memories should be looked like the film you see after a tornado has ripped through a cheap housing tract. There was this wide stretch where there was rubble – broken bits of wood and litter piled up on top of each other. A little girl in a lilac party dress with a purple ribbon in her hair picked through the rubble. Hey wait, that’s me! She bent and picked up something from amongst the debris. “Found it,” she yelled. Then she held up a half-squashed birthday cake with way too many candles mashed into the icing.I remembered having a party breakfast, having a talk with Tara about condoms and getting ready for.
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