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It takes me a long time to start trusting someone, but in the first session with a new psychiatrist I always have to go through what happened and why I’m there. I loathe doing that. It’s really difficult telling my story to a stranger. I get choked up or start rambling about nonsense or get sidetracked and talk about something completely different. Despite the number of times I’ve had to tell the whole story, it never comes out sounding like a story with a beginning, middle and end. My last doctor told me that was normal and that it was an ‘avoidance strategy’.I came home to find Louise busy in the kitchen and the kids doing their homework. Perhaps it would be more correct to say that the girls had finished their own homework and were quizzing Dan about his. My girls are really smart. I know it’s traditional for fathers to say that about their daughters but in my case it’s true, especially for Bec. Tara is clever but Bec seems to make intuitive leaps that can leave me gasping. The. Blanchard called us to lunch, and we ate soup and sandwiches and then sat and talked with her for a bit.“Are you two actually going to come to Chicago?” I asked.“Alan doesn’t like the idea, but I told him that I’d be with Kara the whole time, and that your father would be there, along with your sister. He grudgingly gave Kara permission to go.”“That’s great! Kara, why didn’t you tell me?”“I did, silly! But I think you forgot because we had something more important to discuss.”“True.”The rest of the day and evening went fine, though I did get the usual icy treatment from Mr. Blanchard. When it was time for me to leave, Kara hugged me and gave me a quick kiss on the cheek. She asked me to come for lunch again on Wednesday. I agreed, then headed out to my car and headed home. I was so tired that even though it was just past 8:00pm, I simply said goodnight to my little sister, then went straight to bed. I slept soundly, waking early as I usually did.Stephanie and I swam and then sat down.
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