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He seemed a right nice lad and the more I talked to him I felt an urge towards him.He piled the CD’s that he wanted to borrow on the floor and we talked some more. He lived with his parents and had little money but was trying to get a job. I don’t know what came over me but as he sat there I felt attracted to him even thought I was 33 years older than him. As we talked more he looked at me in an unusual way which I took as a green light.As we sat on the sofa, next to each other, I placed my hand on his knee as he looked into my eyes, smiling he put the CD’s on the floor, turned to face me and roughly grabbed me by the shoulders and pulled me closer to him. I was a little taken back by this but it was too late unless I wanted to look like a right cunt.Moving his hand behind my neck he pulled me closer and kissed me full on the lips, not a peck a full blown kiss, I was shocked. Roughly he prised open my lips with his tongue and then we were kissing, in a way I’ve only ever kissed my. The fact that the tingle still haunted me, it still came over me and now, at least, John was the beneficiary of that sex.John, for all of his love had real deep-set anger towards the whole thing, and I am sure some of that anger was how I had appeared to love what I was doing with those men. It took some time and careful restrained conversation to overcome some of those demons.I had been victimized, drugged and raped. It had become a yearlong nightmare for me. My limits sexually had been expanded and pushed beyond anything I could have imagined a year ago. It would be good for John and I in the future since we would no have far fewer inhibitions towards each other, but the memories would be a constant interference for quite some time yet.How many men have ever seen their wife having sex with men of a different race, or color? How have they dealt with the horror of seeing their wife acting like a whore, begging for more in such graphic detail? John had been brought into my nightmare..
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