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I had a realization last night. I need to be more compassionate toward my wife. She’s almost a decade younger than me. Whereas, I was forged on an anvil of pain she led a very normal life type life. She’s always had someone to protect her. First, her parents and then me. We buried her daddy a little over a year ago from dementia then a few months later I go down and my future is uncertain thus her future is uncertain. Yay, her!I’m expecting something that her life experience has never prepared her for. She’s terrified and doesn’t know whether she’s coming or going. She’s doing the best she can with what she has. For decades I have defined love as commitment partially because I realize that feelings change, partially because I understand commitment, and last but not least I don’t understand emotions well. Compassion is an emotion that may be the force behind a commitment but it is not a commitment itself. What if she doesn’t have it in her to keep her commitment to me no matter how. "I rolled to the side, and pulled her on top of me. Taking her full weight, she rested atop me, her legs stretched between mine, my hands resting on her butt cheeks. We forgot about dinner.The following Monday I came home to a different scene. Coming into the apartment I said, "Hey did you see that sweet IROC across the street?" There was a brand new Camaro IROC Z, light blue sitting on our little suburban street. Then I noticed Cindy sitting at the table holding a piece of paper tears in her eyes."What's the matter Cindy. What happened?" It's mine." What's yours?" The car. It's mine." She handed me the note......Cindy,First let me say what a pleasure it was to meet you. You are so charming and sweet and it warmed my heart to have my dear Nikki get to know you and become your friend. She has continued to talk about you the past week. 'Cindy said this, Cindy said that. She's so cute and funny, etc, etc.' I rarely see her take to someone like that. I would also like to thank you for for.
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