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It stays with you all day stinging yer ring and generally making your choccie starfish feel like the Shuttle's heat shield. Also makes your ass look like "a Japanese Flag".The Empty Roll DumpRelief - you've finished and reach for the tissue only to find an empty cardboard cylinder staring back at you. Panic overcomes you. You could use the curtains but then someone would ask "where are the curtains?" Use the rug? Nah, too bulky and cumbersome. You then come to the same conclusion that every "empty roll dumper " must face.....pull up yer kecks tighten yer cheeks and shuffle yourself to the nearest loo roll. Failing that you could always use your shirt-tail or one of your socks!The Splash Back DumpThis one drops like a depth charge creating a column of cold water that washes your sphincter with a startlingly unpleasant shock. Now your wet - and embarrassed if the column of water went half way up your back. Tip of the day: blot instead of wiping.The c***dbirth DumpThis one is just too. ***** They met the next evening at a dark little Italian restaurant not far from the campus. Jack put more effort than usual into his appearance, which made him slightly late getting to dinner. Chris was already seated, and he hid his disappointment at finding her in a simple and demure blue dress. Their dinner conversation touched on his career goals, classes, extracurricular interests, and why he thought he had difficulty writing. Several times during dinner Jack tried to find out more about Chris, but each time she deftly turned the inquiry back to him. As Jack was finishing the last of his veal, he commented that he didn’t seem to have problems in his other classes, subjects like accounting, history and pre- law. It was only in the ‘creative’ writing tasks that he ran into a blank wall. That brought a smile to Chris’s face. ‘That’s quite good,’ she said encouragingly, ‘when you recognize that yourself it usually means we can unlock your creative juices – with some hard work and a.
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