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You saw what happened to your face. You have some broken ribs, and your left foot has got some broken bones. And there was some internal injury, too. You’ve got some blood in your urine.”“Jesus!” I exclaimed.“Watch your mouth, young man,” admonished my mother. “In the condition you’re in it will be easy to wash your mouth out with soap!”“How am I supposed to go to the bathroom? I can’t even get up!”“You’ve been catheterized,” she told me.“What’s that mean?”Mom looked a bit embarrassed and answered, “A catheter tube has been inserted into your urethra.”“Huh?”“They put a tube up your dick,” explained Dad.“Oh, shit!” I exclaimed. Dad smiled and Mom looked exasperated. “Listen, is that, like, permanent?” I was starting to get to the point where that portion of my anatomy was more interesting than I had originally thought. A tube up there would be a problem.Dad laughed. “No, but I wouldn’t be planning on dating anybody for a bit.”“Jack!” Mom protested.“Just don’t tell Jack and Bobbie. (It would be like ELVIS seeing his character eating a fried peanut butter and banana sandwich. Did you know ELVIS loved that?)The upshot is that their little foibles were taken out of the movie ... yet found their way into the tabloids."Sister puts brother's entire banana in her mouth in one swoop" was one fake headline. The other: "Brother shows sis how much tongue he plans to give her!"By the time the movie came out, the misguided antics of the production company had lost most of the potential audience (the bible belters obviously) and also the young teens because of the "R" rating.The movie bombed. Erica and Jules both took hits in public relations, but since this crap happened to both of them together, they knew they were manipulated and commiserated together.Not a month after the movie went into home version (tape and DVD), Erica saw her brother at the Lakers game getting into it with lothario Jack Nickels.It turns out that Jules' date found the older man quite disarming and she.
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